1. Knock, knock.

Who’s there? Woz. Woz who? Up your wazoo!

2. Knock, knock.

Who’s there? Jamaican. Jamaican who? Jamaican me horny.

3. Knock, knock.

Who’s there? Europe. Europe who? I AM NOT A POO! HOW DARE YOU.

4. Knock, knock.

Who’s there? School. School who? School your ass.

5. Knock, knock!

Who’s there? Asshole! Asshole who! Open the door and find out, asshole!

6. Knock, knock.

Who’s there? Fuck you said. Fuck you said who? “Me!”

7. Knock, knock.

Who’s there? Some! Some who? Some asshole talking to a knock-knock joke.

8. Knock, knock.

Who’s there? Bull. Bull who? Bullshitter!

9. Knock, knock.

Who’s there? Tara. Tara who? Tara McClosoff.

10. Knock, knock.

Who’s there? Centipede. Centipede who? Centipede (Santa peed) on the Christmas tree.

11. Knock, knock.

Who’s there? I eat mop. I eat mop who? You eat your poo?! Gross!

12. Knock, knock.

Who’s there? Not someone. Not someone who? Not someone who will get you laid.

13. Knock, knock.

Who’s there? Madam. Madam who? Help, madam, finger is stuck in the door.

14. Knock, knock.

Who’s there? (Sexy voice) Who would you like it to be?

15. Knock, knock.

Who’s there? Justin. Justin who? You’re just in time to hear me fart!

16. Knock, knock.

Who’s there? Amos. Amos who? A mosquito bit me! Knock, knock. Who’s there? Andy. Andy who? And he bit me again!

17. Knock, knock.

Who’s there? Ben. Ben who? Ben down and lick my boots!

18. Knock, knock.

Who’s there? Ivanna Seymour. Ivanna Seymour who? Ivanna Seymour Butts.

19. Knock, knock.

Who’s there? Parton! Parton who? Parton my French!

20. Knock, knock.

Who’s there? Ivana. Ivana who? Ivana kiss your lips off.

21. Knock, knock.

Who’s there? Ivan. Ivan who? Ivan to do something naughty with you!

22. Knock, knock.

Who’s there? Amanda. Amanda who? Amanda lay you, your lonely nights are over!

23. Knock, knock.

Who’s there? Anita! Anita who? Anita, you right now!

24. Knock, knock.

Who’s there? Idaho! Idaho who? I da hoe? No! You da hoe!

25. Knock, knock.

Who’s there? Dewey! Dewey who? Dewey have a condom handy?

26. Knock, knock.

Who’s there? Not your wife.

27. Knock, knock.

Come in. God damn it.

28. Knock, knock.

Who’s there? Tanaka! Tanaka who? Tanaka you up!

29. Knock, knock.

Who’s there? Anita! Anita who? Anita take a shit!

30. Knock, knock.

Who’s there? Budweiser! Budweiser who? Budweiser dirty knock knock jokes so filthy?

31. Knock, knock.

Who’s there? Khan! Khan who? Uh, oh, Khan-dom broke!

32. Knock, knock.

Who’s there? Al! Al who? Al give you a kiss if you open this door!

33. Knock, knock.

Who’s there? Pileup! Pileup who (pile of poo)? Ewwwwwww.

34. Knock, knock.

Who’s there? Anita Colo. Anita Colo who? Anita Colonoscopy.

35. Knock, knock.

Who’s there? Ben Hur. Ben Hur who? Ben hur up!

36. Knock, knock.

Who’s there? Urine. Urine who? Urine secure, don’t know what for.

37. Knock, knock.

Who’s there? Pasta. Pasta, who? Pasta beer, asshole!

38. Knock, knock.

Who’s there? Nicholas! Nicholas who? Knickerless girls shouldn’t climb trees.

39. Knock, knock.

Who’s there? Aldo! Aldo who? Fine, fine, Aldo you!

40. Knock, knock.

Who’s there? Myra! Myra who? My right nut.

41. Knock, knock.

Who’s there? Iguana. Iguana who? Iguana touch your butt.

42. Knock, knock.

Who’s there? Kiss. Kiss who? Kiss me!

43. Knock, knock.

Who’s there? Ice cream. Ice cream who? Ice cream all night if you’re lucky.

44. Knock, knock.

Who’s there? Ben Dover. Ben Dover who? Ben Dover and I’ll give you a big surprise!

45. Knock, knock.

Who’s there? Waiter. Waiter who? Waiter I get my hands on you.

46. Knock, knock.

Who’s there? May I come in? May I come in who? Not until we have a serious discussion about birth control.

47. Knock, knock!

Who’s there? Cam. Cam who? Camel toe… do you have any pants I can borrow?

48. Knock, knock.

Who’s there? Dozer. Dozer who? Dozer the biggest breasts I’ve ever seen.

49. Knock, knock.

Who’s there? Howie. Howie who? Howie gonna hide this affair from your husband?

50. Knock, knock.

Who’s there? Baby owl. Baby owl who? Baby owl see you later at my place.

51. Knock, knock.

Who’s there? Gladiator. Gladiator who? Gladiator during the threesome.

52. Knock, knock.

Who’s there? Foreskin! Foreskin who? The world’s greatest foreskin teller.

53. Knock, knock.

Who’s there? Boo? Boo who? Stop crying, you pussy. It’s just a joke.

54. Knock, knock.

Who’s there? Bee. Bee who? I like the view from bee-hind you.

55. Knock knock!

Who’s there? Butch, Jimmy, and Joe. Butch, Jimmy, and Joe who? Butch your arms around me, Jimmy a big hot kiss, and let’s Joe!

56. Knock, knock!

Who’s there? King Henry the Second. King Henry the Second, who? King Henry, we’ll bring in the girls the second the queen leaves!

57. Knock, knock.

Who’s there? When where. When, where, who? Tonight, my place, you and me.

58. Knock, knock.

Who’s there? Ima Reilly. Ima Reilly who? Ima Reilly excited to see you naked later.

59. Knock, knock.

Who’s there? Do you want two CDs? Do you want two CDs who? Do you want to CDs banging body?

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60. Knock, knock.

Who’s there? Willis! Willis who? Willis be the first time I kiss you?

61. Knock, knock.

(Who’s there?) Mayan Ipples. (Mayan Ipples who?) Mayan Ipples are so hard right now.

62. Knock, knock.

(Who’s there?) Izzy Data. (Izzy Data who?) Izzy Data test tube in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?

63. Knock, knock.

(Who’s there?) A yam. (A yam who?) A yam so wet for you right now.

64. Knock, knock.

(Who’s there?) Amanda squeeze. (Amanda squeeze who?) Do you want Amanda to squeeze you all night?

65. Knock, knock.

(Who’s there?) Tara. (Tara who?) Tara McClosoff.

66. Knock, knock.

(Who’s there?) Someone. (Someone who?) Someone who will get you laid.

68. Knock, knock.

(Who’s there?) Justin. (Justin, who?) You’re justin time to see me strip for you.

69. Knock, knock.

(Who’s there?) Ben. (Ben who?) Ben down and kiss my booty!

70. Knock, knock.

(Who’s there?) Ivanna Seymour. (Ivanna Seymour who?) Ivanna Seymour of you, naked.

71. Knock, knock.

(Who’s there?) Parton! (Parton who?) Parton my lips for you.

72. Knock, knock.

(Who’s there?) Ivana. (Ivana who?) Ivana, kiss you all over.

73. Knock, knock.

(Who’s there?) Ivan. (Ivan who?) Ivan to do something naughty with you!

75. Knock, knock.

(Who’s there?) Ida. (Ida who?) Ida rather be naked with you right now.

76. Knock, knock.

(Who’s there?) Dewey! (Dewey who?) Dewey have a condom handy?

77. Knock, knock.

(Who’s there?) Ida Comfort. (Ida Comfort who?) Ida comfort you a long time ago if I’d known how hot you are.

78. Knock, knock.

(Who’s there?) Al. (Al who?) Al let you touch my booty if you open this door.

79. Knock, knock.

(Who’s there?) Ben Hur. (Ben Hur who?) Ben hur over!

80. Knock, knock.

(Who’s there?) Iguana. (Iguana who?) Iguana feel you up, baby.

81. Knock, knock.

(Who’s there?) Ice cream. (Ice cream who?) Ice cream for you all night long.

82. Knock, knock.

(Who’s there?) Dozer. (Dozer who?) Dozer some great assets you got there.

83. Knock, knock.

(Who’s there?) Baby owl. (Baby owl who?) Baby owl see you later at my place.

84. Knock, knock.

(Who’s there?) Howie. (Howie who?) Howie gonna get freaky tonight?

85. Knock, knock.

(Who’s there?) Gladiator. (Gladiator who?) Gladiator during that threesome.

86. Knock, knock.

(Who’s there?) Boo. (Boo who?) Will you stop crying if I give you a kiss?

87. Knock, knock.

(Who’s there?) Orange. (Orange who?) Orange you glad this isn’t actually a banana?

88. Knock, knock.

(Who’s there?) When where. (When where who?) Tonight, my place, you and me.

89. Knock, knock.

(Who’s there?) Do you want two CDs? (Do you want two CDs who?) Do you want to CDs nudes?

90. Knock, knock.

(Who’s there?) Jamaican. (Jamaican who?) Jamaican me horny.

91. Knock, knock.

(Who’s there?) Anita. (Anita who?) Anita you inside me.

92. Knock, knock.

(Who’s there?) Waiter. (Waiter who?) Just waiter I get my hands on you.

93. Knock, knock.

(Who’s there?) Baghdad. (Baghdad who?) I’d love to see you Baghdad ass up.

94. Knock, knock.

(Who’s there?) Disguise. (Disguise who?) Disguise your boyfriend? I can do you better.

95. Knock, knock.

(Who’s there?) Ike Anne. (Ike Anne who?) Ike Anne rock your world, baby.

96. Knock, knock.

(Who’s there?) Phil. (Phil who?) Phil McCrackin.

97. Knock, knock.

(Who’s there?) Orange. (Orange who?) Orange you excited to see me naked later?

98. Knock, knock.

(Who’s there?) Lisa. (Lisa, who?) Lisa, you could help me take these pants off.

99. Knock, knock.

(Who’s there?) King Yvonne. (King Yvonne who?) Kinky Von Kinkster, at your service.

100. Knock, knock.

(Who’s there?) Boss bank. (Boss bank who?) Boss bank you tonight if you’re naughty.

101. Knock knock,
who’s there? master, master who, master baiter

102. Knock knock,
who’s there? Mike, Mike who? Mike Oxlong

103. Knock knock,
who’s there? Fire!, fire who? It’s not that bad, just need someone to blow me

104. Knock knock,
who’s there?
Pat, Pat who?
Pat Myas

5. Knock knock,
who’s there?
The seamstress,
the seamstress who?
I’m just trying to get the carpet to match the drapes

106. Knock knock,
who’s there?
Ivana who?
Ivana lay you

107. Knock knock,
who’s there?
the waitress,
the waitress who,
I just needed the tip

108. Knock knock,
who’s there?
Heywood who?
Heywood Jablowme

109. Knock knock,
who’s there?
please pray for,
please pray for who?
me, I can only do the missionary position

110. Knock knock,
who’s there?
Harry who?
Harry Anus

111. Knock knock,
who’s there?
lover who?
It’s me,
how many lovers do you have?

112. Knock knock,
who’s there?
Mike who?
Mike Weiner

13. Knock knock,
who’s there?
The mechanic,
the mechanic who?
I heard you wanted a rim job

114. Knock Knock,
who’s there?
Black Beard,
Black Beard who?
Black Beard the Pirate because I got that booty

115. Knock knock,
who’s there?
the dentist,
the dentist who?
I heard you had some cavities that needed filling.

116. Knock knock,
who’s there?
Tag, tag who?
I thought you said you wanted to be chaste

117. Knock knock,
who’s there?
Ivana who?
Ivana have a good time

118. Knock knock,
who’s there?
Toot toot,
toot toot who?
no one,
I was actually just motorboating

119. Knock knock,
who’s there?
Justin who?
Justin time for something naughty

120. Knock knock,
who’s there?
I’m poor knee,
I’m poor knee who?
I guess we have to do something about that

121. Knock knock,
who’s there?
I’m stuck up here,
I’m stuck up here who?
I just need someone to get me off

122. Knock knock,
who’s there?
Can I come in?
Can I come in who,
OK but just this once

123. Knock knock,
who’s there?
Dover who?
Ben Dover and I’ll show you

124. Knock knock,
who’s there?
Can I come in?
Can I come in who?

125. Knock knock,
who’s there?
Idaho who?
No! You da ho!

126. Knock knock,
who’s there?
Olive Juice,
Olive Juice who?
Oh, I love you too!

127. Knock knock,
who’s there?
Cam who?
Camel toe, can I borrow some pants?

128. Knock knock,
who’s there?
Ben Her,
Ben Her who?
Ben her over and I’ll take it from there

129. Knock knock,
who’s there?
Tex who?
It Tex two to tango

130. Knock knock,
who’s there?
Juicy who?
juicy that lady’s rack?

131. Knock knock,
who’s there?
Willie who?
Willie Stroker or should I?

132. Knock knock,
who’s there?
Dixie who?
His Dixie Normous

133. Knock knock,
who’s there?
Jack who?
I’m the Jack Goff

134. Knock knock,
who’s there?
Mike who?
Mike Litoris

135. Knock knock,
who’s there?
How could you forget my name after last night?

136. Knock knock,
who’s there?
Interrupting turrets,
interrupting turr…“$h!t!”

137. Knock knock,
who’s there?
Hugh who?
Hugh Jass

138. Knock knock,
who’s there?
Hugh who?
Hugh G. Rection

139. Knock knock,
who’s there?
Phil who?
Phil McKrackin

140. Knock knock,
who’s there?
Alpha who?
Alpha Q.

141. Knock knock,
who’s there?
Child dress,
child dress who?
Well I didn’t want to make you an adultress

142. Knock knock,
who’s there?
Harry who?
Harry Balsac

143. Knock knock,
who’s there?
Craven who?
Craven Moorehead

144. Knock knock,
who’s there?
Bo who?
Bo Nerr

145. Knock knock,
who’s there?
Jenny who?
Jenny Talia

146. Knock knock,
who’s there?
Tess who?
Tess Tickles

147. Knock knock,
who’s there?
Gordon who?
Gordon Rams Me

148. Knock knock,
who’s there?
Kimmy who?
Kimmy head

149. Knock knock,
who’s there?
Salt who?
Salt T. Nuts

150. Knock knock,
who’s there?
Dill who?
Dill Dough

151. Knock knock,
who’s there?
Taj who?
Taj Maddick

152. Knock knock,
who’s there?
Anita who?
Anita P. Ness

153. Knock, Knock,
who’s there?
I would have knocked but the doorbell was at waist height

154. Knock knock,
who’s there?
Erik who?
Erik Shawn

155. Knock knock,
who’s there?
excuse me,
excuse me who,
I’ll just pull out


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